Tuesday, December 14, 2010

I believe...

Kind souls are recognized. Recently, I have had two different women with M.S. search me out and use me as a sounding board, advice giver.

I am hesitant with the advice, but I do give it when asked. One girl "S" needs virtual hugs and prayers so bad it scares me. In one month, she has been diagnosed, treated with mega-steroids, gotten a bizzare depersonalization disorder overnight. Her boyfriend just decided now that she's broken he does not love her. She is struggling with the will to live. With all that, I probably would too. In my case, I have a family to live for so drastic thoughts are just not viable. I just want to grab her up and take her home, feed her and smack her boyfriend.

Another girl may be coming out of denial about her M.S. This I totally understand. I spent almost two years in denial. I wanted ANYTHING, anything but M.S. I was willing to take my chances with cancer of the spinal cord. A year and a half and good meds later, I am okay with it. The good meds really were the key. Thank God for some Geodone. It has me up, happy and able to deal with my teenagers drama, sorta.

I feel honored people have sought me out. I don't know everything, but I have got my head around this disease... for the most part. People who just meet me wouldn't know that I am so caring and kind. I hide behind a mean face.... nah, I am just a little shy. It takes a little time for me to open up to people.

I hope I can continue this role in the future. Helping people was my job, now it just feels like a calling.

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